in honour of my father | final version

translator:  Mataforgana

translated poem: pamięci mojego taty -  wyimaginowana
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year 1992
nestled in the browned garlic scent of hops
with the head rested on the coarse knees of feelings
I was constructing my identity in the rhythm of the ebb

"People from the child’s environment are so deeply sunk in their own state of neurosis, that they cannot love their child or even perceive a certain individuality in it”.

you heard my crying among the crowd of blinds
being worried about the helplessness of the 1988
you tore my life out of the claws of conformity

"Their attitude is determined by their own neurotic reactions. They tend to be dominant, overprotective, daunting, spiky, irritable, high-demanding, too lenient, volatile and inconsistent, favouring a given child, false, indifferent…”

you raised a shelter for me with your trembling hands
you heart lighting up the darkness of my room
knowing, that I will appreciate this just after death

"Usually, we can observe the whole constellation of factors which have a detrimental influence on the child’s development”.

year 2007
I found Your tombstone covered with words
I queued up to express them
but when I reached the end, it was too late

"As a result of that influences a child cannot develop a sense of belonging, it cannot feel the use of the term „we”, it is tormented by the feeling of uncertainty and the unclear fear, which is known as the primal fear – expressed in the sense of isolation and helplessness, which is noticed as potentially inimical”.

Dad… what were all that trials, debates, articles for… suffice it to say "Love you, sweetie”.
We both lacked of that…


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